There have been a few very difficult things I have had to do in my life, this however, has been the most ugly awful thing yet. We brought Vince home from the hospital yesterday, the energy felt so wrong. Vince is so weak that it took me and two others to help him into the car. Driving to Vince's apt. was quiet and the air felt heavy. Getting him out of the car was even worse. After I got him into bed and knew he was sleeping I just lost it. My brother is so small that I can lift him with no trouble. When he woke he seemed edgy. He was upset that no one had told him what was going on. Mom and I sat on the couch Nicholas on a chair next to Vince. I took a huge deep breath and began telling Vince about the medicine changes, then the doctors we had to see in the next few weeks. Then I told him about how bad the cancer is and the two choices he has. By that time we were all crying. Vince looked up at me and with his big blue eyes told me he loved me. Then he said, "All of this because of a donated kidney." We talked off and on all day. It was a tough FRIGGIN day and night. Today Vince has had a good day. He has been making us laugh all day with his jokes and his funny faces. He also asked me for my cell phone and to dial Mike. Vince told him how much he loved him and he was sorry that I had to be away from him right now. That he didn't know what he would do if I was not here. Now I did not know all of this because Vince pointed his finger for me to leave the room. Mike told me later. Another funny memory. I still have no transport for Vince and it seems everything we try to do a door is slammed in our faces. What ever test this is suppose to be I wish the "powers that be" would let up on us.
Oh, Vince just asked what I was doing. I said, "Playing on my blog" He said, "Tell everyone I said hi and to keep praying for me." OK so that chocked me up. We celebrated Father's Day today in case Vince isn't as alert tomorrow.
All of you are a blessing to me. All the loving emails and comments really do help me. Thank You Thank You and Thank You again.
Honor and Integrity in Life in Art